In the rural town of Sicily where I grew up, life was simple. I took for granted the beauty of the mountains, the verdant tapestry of grain fields, and the charm of the idyllic countryside.

I never imagined that things could change drastically, yet at age 16, coming home from an average day out of town, I noticed a gathering for what seemed to be a funeral. Naively thinking that it was for my 93-year-old grandfather, who had crossed the line of the so called life’s expectancy, I walked in to realise that it was my healthy, 50-year-old father who had died accidentally. My heart turned to stone. A cascade of mixed feelings of grief, anger, and guilt rushed through all at once, unable to truly comprehend what this meant.  

A simple man, farmer and father, who had provided a blanket of protection for the family, had left without any warning. Reality shattered as if I awoke from a dream. Uncertainty and a sense of meaningless clouded my mind for many years thereafter, thrusting me into an existential crisis. This led to the unrelenting pursuit of purpose and questioning everything; nothing was taken for granted.

Death was inevitable.

The mind, incapable of facing this inevitable fact that all is transient, became restless in pursuit of worldly desires. In my case, the heart was desperate for the Truth, but the mind took precedence, and I became entrenched in seeking knowledge. I pursued a career in medicine with specialty in psychiatry. Embarking on the journey of matrimony and cultivating a family, I discovered myself adorned with the mantle of a devoted father to two extraordinary boys and the cherished role of a husband to a loving and caring wife. However, despite having traversed the path of parenthood and retired from a distinguished career as a psychiatrist, a profound yearning within the depths of my heart remained unfulfilled.

The seeking turned inward to the Heart’s call from its inherent source.

While Krishnamurti’s teachings were valuable, the dialogue groups I often attended remained a dry intellectual exploration of the human condition; they didn’t quench the Heart’s longstanding thirst for Truth.

Meeting Leowe, a Being with no prior history of pursuing enlightenment or awakening or being engaged with any spiritual practices, rekindled humbleness and a love for the mystery of life and all creation, and a familiarity with what I felt in my early years was brought to surface. His life and work reminded me of the innocence and humbleness of St. Francis of Assisi establishing his companionship to be in service of the Truth.

In the most simple and direct way, Leowe pointed out that this mental endeavour is far from living within the purity and joy of the heart. It became clear how knowledge was sustaining an identity of a person who wanted to possess wisdom and how it cast a subtler shadow of arrogance; “now I know” obscured the innocence of the Heart, the source of true Wisdom of not knowing. I became increasingly curious of Leowe’s way of living and the direct way to the “Home in the Heart.”

Leowe is a living proof that it is possible to function free from personhood and not be trapped by societal values or the demands of the world.

During satsangs, there was sometimes restlessness due to the mind wanting to express my understanding. However, this was met with the realisation that words obscured the gentle breeze of gratitude, joy, and peace felt in the Heart.

In this transitional phase of not knowing, there is no control at all of how the way unfolds. The only reliable companion is patience and devotion to the longing itself.

One thing is now absolutely certain: It’s not possible to merge with the creative flow of Life without leaving the familiar self behind.

In satsangs, there were moments of Grace when words could not be spoken and there was witnessing of powerful release of old egoic patterns of suppressed emotions. From then on, emotions such as old pain, fear, guilt, and arrogance — that have been the foundation of personhood — have been slowly crumbling more and more in the Presence of Being. The Heart knows that it is a blessing and although not a pleasant process, that it is a necessary one.

In this ongoing journey of coming Home, I’ve come to realise that the opening of the Heart requires no prerequisites — nothing needs to be done, no problems to be solved, and no profound knowledge to be achieved.

As I embark on this journey with total trust and complete earnestness, in disbelief, my heart unfurls like a clandestine rosebud, revealing its unseen beauty. It is a pristine feeling unknown to the mind.

I’m grateful to Leowe for patiently mirroring my blind spots and holding my hand on the way to the OneHeart. Now “I” must abide in It.

In joyful service to Life,
Natale